he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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