Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
