if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
its liver damage thursday
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
