I don't remember. Are we still dating?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I came so hard my ears popped.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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