but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
it hurts more in the daytime
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
