I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
