Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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