is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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