I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
