on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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