U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
