Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
