we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize
