What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
