She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
