Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
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