So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Randomize
