Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i wish my penis had a tongue
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
