just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
