so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
