Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
