just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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