This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Randomize
