S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
