Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Im part way to drunk.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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