Where is the hickey?
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Randomize
