Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
