So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
please come you make the beer taste better
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
