I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
