Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Randomize
