I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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