East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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