After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize