so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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