Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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