I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
