In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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