So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
