You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Randomize
