Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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