I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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