I want to stick my p in your. b.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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