smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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