too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
