In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize