Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
