Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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