There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
