He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
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