During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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